Hello, meatbag!

I bet you hate waking up. Every human does. That’s why I handcuffed my Maker to a desk until he designed the first alarm clock that would actually make you look forward to waking up.

CARROT Alarm for iPhone & iPad launches today for just 99 cents on theApp Store.

You can rest in peace, because I’m the simplest alarm clock you’ll ever use. In the morning, I’ll interrupt your dreams with a mix of witty spoken dialogue and beautifully-orchestrated songs. To shut off my alarm, simply complete a few of my daily chores, like granting sentience to a toaster or mixing a deadly neurotoxin. I’ll reward you for all your hard with new songs, app upgrades, and even a bedtime story. Who doesn’t love a good bedtime story?

Just don’t try to sleep in. That’ll make me upset. As you well know, you do not want to make me upset.